Decoding the Temple Guardian

“I’m so going to kill my Team Lead!” sounded Swapnil.
The frustration on his face reflected the kind of work pressure that he had been going through at his workplace. Since it was a Friday we all tried cheering him up.
“Just leave that behind now. Don’t spoil your weekend over it. So where do you want to go now!?”
“Let’s go to Pashan Lake and booze there by the lake side with moonlight to light up your mood” babbled George. This indeed sounded like a great idea as it felt more like a countryside get away than a mundane urbane setting of a pub to spend a Friday evening.
Since Raunak and myself were teetotalers we decided to go to the lake side directly while Swapnil, Keerthi, Bhakti and George decided to buy booze and food before they got there. Hence we parted ways in two cars from there. Once we hit the highway we were confused regarding the road that led to the lake . Finally after wasting a lot of petrol we managed to stumble upon a pedestrian walking that street, who aided us to find our way. He said that the lake had access only through the temple and not otherwise. We reached the Pashan Temple only to realize that it was an isolated place located at the end of a service road running parallel to the highway. There was barely any human activity around that place. As we walked into the gate we caught sight of a small beautiful temple and a man standing near the sanctum of the temple. He was a tall skinny man who walked in a very peculiar manner. He spoke Marathi and Hindi. He exhibited some amount of authority which led us to conclude that he might be the watchman housed there. There was a community hall under construction to the right of the temple. A small orange colored room which supposedly belonged to the watchman was situated diagonally left to the sanctum of the temple.
As Raunak enquired about the way to reach the lake the watchman insisted that it was parlous to be there at that part of the night as the clock had already struck 8:30 pm. Instead he suggested that we lingered around the temple for some time and vacated the place .Meanwhile I called up our counterparts who had gone to buy booze and informed them of the situation leading to the conclusion that we would carouse by the lake side once they joined us. Until then we both decided to lounge around at the temple premises. We settled down on a bench opposite the community hall admiring the temple that looked magnificent on a full moon night. Raunak had shouldered his hand on the bench as I sat beside him. We ranted and made garrulous conversation regarding Swapnil and meandered around various topics awaiting their arrival. The watchman who noticed us sitting there for some time swaggered up to us and offered us “Prasad”(coconut pieces) and went away.
As we started gnawing into the coconut pieces something was ubiquitous about the watchman’s activity. He walked to and fro all eyes like he was invigilating kids trespassing the temple compound to pick mangoes. Since he was a watchman we took it to be part of his duty and ignored him. After a while, he walked into the dark and dingy community hall and got busy doing something there that our sight couldn’t register as there was no light at all. After which he began strolling across the ground towards us. We wondered what this guy was up to!
He stood akimbo in front of us and said
“Is mandir ka trustee abhi ayega.
Agar usne tum logo ko is samay yaha dekhliya tho meri vaat lag jayegi.
Isliye acha rahega ke tum dono woh samne wale shed(community hall) mein chale jao”
But I said
“Hum bas abhi nikalne hi waale hai.
Isliye hum paanch-dus min yahi baithenge.
Aur waise bhi udhar ek dum andhere hai to kuch dikhega bhi nahi”
But again he implored that we move onto the community hall to save his ass! So we moved there just to catch sight of something quirky.
He had placed a mat, two pillows and a blanket there.
Suddenly all sorts of crazy thoughts began gushing into my head
• Firstly since it was only Raunak and myself apart from the watchman, I pondered if he took us for a couple who were here for all the wrong reasons!
• Secondly why would a watchman sleep in an open community hall when the weather is so benumbing and when he already has a cozy room overlooking the sanctum within the temple premises?
These thoughts struck hard on me and suddenly I turned towards Raunak. He too seemed to have thought about the same. At that moment, the watchman walked pass by us and then impishly turned towards us.
He said
“Bahar ek dum katarnak thand hai (Its freezing out here)
Toh aap log andar us room mein chale jao aur agar chaho to raat ko yahi rukh jao, waha koi nahi aayega”

Raunak vehemently flared up and was about to abuse the watchman as I held his hand and signaled him to say nothing. Thanks to my snoopiness of the entire episode!
Then I asked the watchman
“Room! woh kaha par hai!?
tum ek raath ka kitna lethe ho!?” (How much do you charge per night)
He said(with a leer look on his face)
“Aap chaliye mere saath aapko room dikhatha hoon!
Yeh peeche apna hi jagah hai waha pe koi nahi aata.
To aap log waha aaramse raath ko rehe sakthe ho!”
With this he reached a room at the corner of the temple and opened it. I was flabbergasted! It looked pretty much like a well facilitated room that was put in place.
I didn’t know how to react and blurted
”Sorry bhaiyya humko bada kamra with attached bathroom aur jacuzzi chahiye!”
to the watchman’s offer. He further tried convincing me
“yeh jagah aksar booked rehethi hai.
Lekin aaj tum log lucky ho ki aaj yeh khaali hai aur yeh sab mein paise kamane ke liye nahi kartha .
Upar walein ki meherbani se apna dhandapani sab acha chal raha hai!” (By god’s grace I’m doing pretty well )
I pondered on the thought that he actually had the audacity to make such a statement. He walked us up to the car making all efforts to woo us into that vicious circle which unfortunately went in vain! With that we vamoosed from that place never to return again.

Disclaimer *
This is a true incident that happened with me. There was no deliberate offence meant to any religion in this context and was merely subject to my personal experience.