BMTC Bus In Motion

Hindhe Hogi Hindhe Hogi
(Go Back Go Back)
Ashtondh jaga edhe alli
(There is so much space there)
Yaralli ticket?
(Buy your tickets)
sounded the bus conductor of a typical BMTC bus. The bus is packed with human beings worried about getting a seat rather than being happy that he is still alive with that 2% of oxygen available in that steel compartment. There is barely any space for people to stand inside the bus in spite of which the bus driver diligently stops at every stop and for every other person who waves his hand to take that ride. Meanwhile the conductor is only bothered about the space that he can still create to accommodate another 15 of them irrespective of the truth that people press into each other in order to enable the bus driver to close the doors. As the people are trying hard to find some space to hold on to themselves with the help of the rods the conductor wades through the crowd like a fish in the water. Genetically, bus conductors are born so thin that they can squeeze through and fit themselves anywhere. This acts negatively on the healthy people who are on his bus. As he goes about his duty of issuing tickets he makes sure he gets the required attention from the people who usually are not prone to carry the exact change. As he swings himself from one side to the other in tandem to the driver's driving he randomly makes a comment on that poor girl's size who is finding it hard to let the conductor squeeze past her. Conductor do justice to their jobs by unwantedly raising their voice as if it provided some kind of a bonus to the compensation that they already receive.
The same nature is inversed if the conductor knows that a few girls whom he knows is on the bus. Then he acts all civilized. He mellows down his voice and you will find him flirting with those college going kids with a sly smile on his face. Begins his writing work on that one sheet of paper that he holds with a cardboard beneath it. Then his conversation topic undergoes metamorphosis from abusing the next bus driver who is speeding past his bus to homely matters! Suddenly it strikes him that he has to keep a tab on the collection obtained with that trip and starts counting notes. He becomes conscious of the fact that 'Ladies' seat belongs to the same gender and not the other.
You have been comfortably seated on that bus and the person sitting next to you gets down at his stop. Then there is a bull fight for that one seat in the process of which your expensive 'Catwalk' shoes gets stamped. Now the worst part is the lady sitting opposite to you facing you has a kindergarten kid in her hand. That kid is up to mischief and keeps kicking your black formal pants soiling your clothes that was worn intended to impress your client so that you get the required hike during your appraisal period. As you are recuperating from the heartbreak of having gotten up in the morning to iron that pant you will feel somebody rubbing against you. As you raise your head you will find that the conductors ass is rubbing against your shoulder as he is trying to balance himself. This just adds to your frustration and more creepy thoughts are churned in your head. Is he doing it on purpose!?Omg! He is rubbing it on my clean shirt!?Duhh.. he stinks! why can't he take a shower and come? and so on..
Amidst all this there will be a handsome looking techie who would have just hopped on the bus with his huge laptop bag from the front door. As he is up to enlightening your mood the conductor is right there to grab all the limelight from him and whine about the huge bag that he has on him which consumes so much space and shoos him away to the back only to reassure the guys in the bus that only I get to be there(among the ladies)!This might appear to be heart breaking for guys who would want to stand next to their chicks and make random conversation during the ride! With so much happening around you fail to notice that your cleavage is visible. Suddenly you will notice a dozen pair of eyes gaping at you like you just stole their virginity! This is the time when you realize that it's a taboo if girls showed their cleavage even by mistake while they have all the rights reserved to fantasize them secretly!
Finally by the time you have to get down at your stop there is a plethora of thoughts running in your head that leaves you drained with all the positivity required to start your day at office with much more to handle there!